Thanksgiving thoughts

I'm sorry...but who's the bigger turkey here?!



Happy Thanksgiving to you all. Don't catch bird flu!

- ACL

The Brawl (one year later)

It's a year to the date of the now infamous brawl between the Detroit Pistons and the Indiana Pacers. I have to admit that I found the whole thing entertaining. I suspect that it had more to do with the analysts and the commentators than the actual fighting. But it was entertaining, nonetheless. See for yourself: http://www.ifilm.com/ifilmdetail/2657302?refsite=7063&ns=1

I thought that it was ironic that the league went down so heavily on Ron Artest (one of the key players in this whole thing) by suspending him for the entire season. After all, it was overreaction from Ben Wallace from a foul, coupled by a fan's instigation that caused the conflict to brew in the first place. In my opinion, Artest was, for lack of a better phrase, a "victim of environment".

The expectation with professional, HIGHLY PAID athletes is that certain standards apply to their conduct. To a large extent, I agree. But, let's keep it real here: before they are professionals who make a bunch of $$$, they are humans, first and foremost. If you have people hurling beer at you, shouting obscenities and, worse yet, attacking you, then--chances are-- your first response is "Kick his @#$"; not "Oh well, I'm rich. I've got a standard to uphold."

Money can buy lots of things. But, rest assured, it can't buy civility.

- ACL

Owned!

Saturday, November 19, 2005: A date which will live in Michigan Football infamy.

My beloved Wolverines lost a heartbreaker to the hated rivals from the south, the Ohio State Buckeyes; 25-21. The lost marked the second straight year that the Bucks had their way with us. What better way is there to cap off a disappointing 4-loss season than with a loss against a huge rival in your own backyard?!

Oh well. I hope we have success in the Alamo Bowl. So what if it's not a BCS Bowl. *Please note the sarcasm*

Sigh!

- ACL

No end in sight...

I've seen this image a thousand times before, but it always seems to strike a chord with me. If you look closely, this collage is a collection of photos of soldiers killed in this senseless Iraqi war that's been going on now for over two years. Manipulated correctly, these images take the shape of the person most responsible for this seemingly indelible situation: your President.

Now, I've always been against this war and its author, Mr. Bush. Whether it was sold to the public by using outright lies and fear tactics or if it was the result of innocent but serious intelligence failures, the fact remains that we are still fighting and dying in Iraq, when it has been made clear that it posed no formidable threat to "our freedom". With no reasonable exit strategy, a lack of clearly defined objectives, and a faceless enemy, this conflict ranks up there with some of the most dangerous and irresponsible blunders in our time. Evidenced by the widespread decline in support of this war (even on the part of conservatives), it seems that I'm not the only one who is in opposition.

I've always been humored by the stories that Bush and his friends used to try and convince the American public . You know. The ones where Saddam had a Death Ray pointed directly at each one of our houses and would strike at any moment. The ones where Cowboy Bush and his desperados were the only ones who could protect us. Isn't it funny how most of the "protective" mechanisms that Bush uses to "fight terrorism" (i.e. pre-emptive war, Patriot Acts, heightened security, etc.) are even more spooky than terrorism itself? Before you answer that one, I dare you to type "how to blow up a building" on Google or to yell "I've got a bomb" at an airport. Go on. I double dog dare you!

But when my humor about this whole situation dies down, I'm reminded of all of the innocent people; Americans, Brits, Iraqis, etc.; whose lives have been forever changed or even destroyed by the destructive agendas of a few old, white men (my apologies to the old white men to whom none of this applies). People who have never been to war, much less picked up a weapon are quick to send someone else's kids, parents, spouses, family, and friends to fight battles that they create with rhetoric. Equally as disturbing is the idea that anyone who shows the slightest bit of protest and dissent against these "Stupid White Men" are then called 'un-American'. Well, if America is a symbol of violence, destruction, greed, world domination, idealogy force-feeding, and hypocrisy, then I guess I'm guilty as charged.

I can only pray that the God that Bush claims to love and defend so much will bless his heart with a spirit of love and submission to truth before more innocent people are added to this collage.

- ACL

More dangerous religious folk

I just read an interesting article which reminded me of my mounting frustration with "organized" religion. Here's the link. See it for yourself:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9849697/.

Apparently, the Southern Baptist Convention (SBC) refused to give away truckloads of water to hurricane victims that were donated by Anheuser-Busch simply because they had the company's logo on them. Sure, we're talking about a beer company here. But I don't think that too many people, God included, were all that upset about it. Considering the dilemma, what's more important: the logo on the can or the water inside of the can which provides relief to victims?! I think that this situation underscores a thoroughgoing fallacy from evangelical thinking: the misguided belief that if we associate with "unholiness", then we somehow endorse it. In this case, if we accept water with a beer logo on it, we're endorsing alcholic consumption. How on God's Green Earth can a church of God justify neglecting the needs of many just to avoid "endorsement"?! I'm reminded of the parable that Jesus told where a Samiritan, the "lowest" of all people assisted a beat up man on the side of a road, when priests and church goers all passed him by (probably because they didn't want to associate with him). I think that this is something SBC should have really thought about before completely villifing a beer company interested in helping others.

Looking at groups like SBC, it's no wonder people are turning away from the church and rejecting the Christ that we claim to represent. With all the stuff that we take it upon ourselves to call sin, who care really blame them?! Sometimes I question if the church is a safe haven and a hospital for the 'sick' or if it's an assembly for overly critical, sanctimonious, and condescending "Christians" who hold their piety and self-righteousness over people's head -- without first dealing with their own issues. David Burchett put it best with his book title, "When Bad Christians Happen to Good People". I'll drink to that (even if it is water from a beer company...)!

- ACL

The Victors

Hail to the Victors, valiant. Hail to the conquering heroes. Hail, hail to Michigan. The champions of the West!

My boys put a hurtin' on Northwestern today...and in their own backyard!

Final score: Michigan 33 Northwestern 17

Even though I had a helluva time getting to and from Evanston (you try driving almost 600 miles round trip for a football game!), the crazy tailgate parties and our blowout victory made it all worthwhile. On to the next victim. Go Blue!

- ACL

Human Interest or Corporate Interest?

OK. So am I the only one who feels a little ambivalent about Apple using Rosa Parks as a marketing piece? There is something to be said about corporate sponsorship and corporate responsibility. On the one hand, I guess I can appreciate Apple’s decision to honor Rosa Parks. I mean, if the company wanted to create a synergy between their corporate motto, "Think Different" and her legacy, they certainly did just that. But on the other hand, I can't help but to see it as an exploitation of the her life and death.

The truth is, I personally don't question their motives. But I do question the appropriateness of their campaign. Your thoughts?!

- ACL

Turning the other (broken) cheek

I can't seem to get over the story about a 64-year-old black man who was severely beaten up by New Orleans police. The man, a retired school teacher, was accused of being publicly intoxicated (although, oddly enough, the officers refused to give him a breath-a-lizer test). Funny, huh? Even if that were the case, since when would it take six armed officers to subdue one old man?

At any rate, they broke his cheek, damaged his eye (which required surgery) and left him in a pool of his own blood. When asked if this was a racially motivated attack (five officers were white), the victim's lawyer replied, "...my client does not believe that's what is involved here." Even more remarkable was the man's response when he said, "I hold no animosity against anyone..." Essentially, this man turned the other (broken) cheek.

I need to be more like this man...

- ACL

Money, the root of...?

Lately, I've been struggling with the whole tithing thing. The argument behind tithing is that it's Biblical and must therefore be practiced. I disagree. Here's why:

The fact is; most of the passages in the Bible that address tithing are were directed at Israel specifically; not the the body of Christ. Israel had a certain obligation to live by the law; so much more so than we do now. I mean, if we were to bind ourselves to law, then we'd need to build brazen alters outside of the church so that we could offer up bulls, goats, and sheep. Likewise, anyone who works on the Sabbath (especially those who didn't tithe) needs to be executed. Yikes!

I guess that what bothers me the most is not the misuse of Scripture - but the constant head beatings by pastors about why we need to tithe and what will happen if we don't. They use Malachi 3:8-10 (about "robbing" God) and watch people come diving to the offering plates thinking that if they gave their 10%, God would give them something tangible in return (a car, a new job, a home, etc.) First of all, let me just say that God isn't required to give us anything! God is not some vending machine where you drop a few dollars, hit some faith buttons, and get what you want. By expecting to receive stuff because of our giving is actually robbing him just as much as not giving at all.

While we're on it, since when is money the only thing we should emphasize?! Shouldn't time and talents be included in that giving matrix? We've gotten to the point where we put a price tag on our love for and commitment to Christ. Money can't be the only premium. Otherwise, Jesus would have rejected the widow's offering of two coins (in Luke 21:3-4) and placed more emphasis on the rich cats who brought in their hoards of money.

You've got people who run to church, scream and shout, give all their money - and, at the end of the day have actually done nothing to advance God's kingdom. Now tell me, who's robbing God now?!

The Bible teaches us in II Corinthians 9:7 not to give out of "grudge or out of necessity..." We should give because of our love for God and how He continues to bless us not because we want to perpetuate the classism that comes with tithing or because someone put us on a guilt trip. I think that God would rather see someone give a single dollar cheerfully than a person who gives a $100 for show, with an attitude, or out of fear of what would happen (or wouldn't happen) if they didn't. Don't get me wrong: God will use the contributions from the people I just mentioned. But, I believe that He prefers the cheerful giver.

I really wish people would keep these sorts of things in mind the next time we hear a fifteen minute rant about the importance of giving. I can almost guarantee that when a person TRULY walks with God, they won't hesitate to give anything to Him; time, talents...

...and, of course, money!

- ACL

Who's fault is it anyway?!

Yesterday, I found myself in gripe about America's non-response (or lack of significant response) to other nations and their plights. Today, I want to turn the attention inland. Maybe it's just a rumor; but I heard that John Hagee declared that Hurricane Katrina was the result of God unleashing His judgment on the city of New Orleans for their homosexual lifestyles.

If this is true, then his ideas hold pretty consistent to other evangelicals who believe that God was punishing New Orleans for being sinful; reminenscent of Sodom and Gomorrah. Unbelievable! I mean, if that were the case, then Hollywood and Las Vegas would have been wiped out years ago (don't let me get started on Washington DC). Simply put, this was a natural disaster that our country was totally unprepared for. Now, I do believe that God used scientists and meterologists to warn us ahead of time in the event of a major hurricane. In fact, National Geographic publishied articles (also supported by a television special) about what would happen in this circumstance. We simply ignored the warnings, much like the people ignored Noah. We all know happened then.

God reminds us in Isaiah 55:8-9 that His thoughts and ways are MUCH higher than ours. So, how can we make declarations about what He does and why? I mean, does someone has a special pipeline of revelation that we don't know about? Luke 6 tells us not to condemn people or make judgement about their salvation -- or what should be done with them. Instead, we should try to restore the Spirit of gentleness on a person. But we should NOT stand behind our bully pulpits and say that God was judging New Orleans. Frankly, we have no idea why this happened; other than the fact that the Gulf of Mexico increased in temperature. Sadly though, Katrina has caused people to become dogmatic, judgemental, and condescending to people who lost their lives, their families, their homes...everything they had. As if any of us are so much better...

Next question: Not everyone in New Orleans was unsaved. So why did God wipe out the righteous with the unrighteous? I mean, if my Bible trivia serves me correctly, God allowed Abraham the chance to rescue his nephew Lot and his family from the destruction to come.

Come to think of it, maybe it was God who prevented the relief efforts for the victims. I guess God was also judging Galveston and Houston with Rita, right?! Maybe He was judging California with earthquakes and wildfires? How about America with 9/11? *Please note my sarcasm*

Does America need to repent? Absolutely! But it's not just the people in the so-called "city of iniquity" called New Orleans. Repentence is required in every city, in every home, in every heart. We will all be judged by a God whose love wouldn't WILLFULLY drown children; who loves us too much to wipe out a city just to prove a point -- for such a God would have to, once again, destroy EVERYTHING with a flood. Didn't He promise never to do that again?!

The point I'm trying to make is simple: we really don't know what God is up to so we need to extra careful when attributing things to Him. Instead, we should exercise faith that He, in His sovereignty, perfection, and love, knows exactly what He's doing. Until next time...

- ACL

God Bless America (and apparently, no place else...)

This image only captures a morsel of the story...

The world has been watching in horror and shock as the news has been reporting on the devestating earthquake in Pakistan that has created a death toll of anywhere between 35 and 40,ooo people. Oddly enough, even as people have been suffering on a widespread level, many people fail to show sympathy for their fellow man. I was left aghast that, while most of the world turned its attention to the tens of thousands of people suffering in Pakistan, American media focused primarly on missing white girls, New Orleans "looting", Brad and Angelina, and the NY Yankees. Un-frickin'-believable! Does tragedy have to strike on our soil for us to pay it any attention? 9/11 comes around, and it reshapes our country; but mass murdering in Africa, destructive tsunamis in southeast Asia and violent earthquakes in the middle east get five minute coverage. Amazing!

- ACL

To whom much is given...

I had an interesting conversation with a friend today. We were talking about the BET awards this summer. Now, let the record show that as a black man, I HATE BET (I'll talk about that in another post). I hate MTV, I hate E! Entertainment, I hate People magazine; I really don't like VH1 that much. Basically, I hate pop culture entertainment as it is today.

Now, before I get too far off topic, let's get back to my point...

This post is about the performance that Destiny's Child, featuring the lapdance that they included in their performance. Of course this sparked my curiosity...but not for the reasons that one would suspect. I took interest in seeing their performance not because I wanted to visualize Beyonce and her crew gyrating in short skirts (although they are incredibly beautiful), but because I needed ammunition for more of my blog. Fortunately for me, it worked!

After watching that video, I was absolutely stunned! At the end of their song Cater 2 U, they went out into the crowd and pulled three gentlemen (and I use the term "gentlemen" loosely) in for a little "show". These guys were Magic Johnson, Terrence Howard, and Nelly. Now, to properly inform myself before opening my big mouth, I did some research on these three men. After conducting my own investigation, I learned that two of these men -- Magic and Terrance -- were married. Here's my issue: they both seemed to be enjoying Destiny's Child(ren) more than Nelly; the only single man from the group. Terrance, at one point, looked like he was going to faint. The picture above doesn't lie...

With these men being married, shouldn't these men have rejected the idea of being on the receiving end of a lapdance even if they did so in front of a live studio audience and the entire nation? I can just see their wives at home fuming! What message does this send to married men? Is it OK for married men to get lap dances so long as it's in a performance at an awards show?! Give me a break!

Now, let's turn our attention to the other key players -- Destiny's Child themselves. Although the claim that it was all just a "tease", the point is, they were teasing married men. I wonder if they realize that it's not just adults who watch this stuff, but children as well. What does this type of stuff say to our youth...young girls in particular? Don't they realize that young people are easily influenced by what they see? They try to wear the clothes, talk the talk, and mimic the behaviors of entertainers.

Secondly, last I checked "divas" have all the 'goods' that women have (beauty, elegance, talent, style, and attitude), but they also bear responsibility for how they use it. People like Phylicia Rashad, Sheryl Lee Ralph, Camille Cosby, Oprah Winfrey (as much as she annoys me. This is for another post) -- hell, even Condoleeza Rice come to mind. These are truly dignified black women who don't need to gyrate in tight clothes to gain respect and earn a following. Instead, they rely on their class, aura, and remarkable achievements to set their legacy.

Finally, I'm left wondering how Destiny's Child can profess Christianity while using sex to advance their careers. Does that not ruin their testimony? Does that not water down their faith? On national television at that! If I'm not mistaken, Michelle made a Gospel CD. I wonder how her sales are doing...

But, I guess that, in all things, I can't judge what they do. I think that Christians must be congizant of our roles as Christ's ambassadors without being judgement of those who we feel are ruining their ministry. The only people who can really judge them are God and themselves. I'm not either.

Still, I'll always fervently believe that "to whom much is given, much is required..." Later!

- ACL

More gripes about religion

I have several issues with some people's views on Christianity -- especially in the Black church. The way we practice Christianity has simply become TOO religious. From my experience, I understand that religion has absolutely NOTHING to do with Christ. Religion is nothing more than doing something in repitition and tradition; essentially from the head and not from the heart. Christianity, inversely, is about our relationship with Christ and the body of Christ. I hate to admit it, but I don't think that this concept is well know or understood in today's church.

Sadly, many people in the body of Christ take issue with their brothers and sisters simply because of a difference in experience, which is merely a product of upbringing. But, how can we, as Christians, win lost souls with these differences? How can we live a life that pleasing to God if we don't get along? To put it in its lowest denominator, we need to get our acts together. Jesus is coming back for a church with spot or wrinkle. Now, where's my iron...?

- ACL

Forgive and forget?!

I'm so sick of my Sunday School class! For some bizarre reason, my Pastor saw fit to create a "Christian singles" class; apparently to help singles to confront relationship issues that may impede their growth in Christ. On paper, the idea sounds good. But if you sat in my class for ten minutes, you'd hate it as much as I do! Don't get me wrong, I'm all for Sunday School meeting needs. But, it can only go so far in planting that seed. At some point, the people in the class have to make effort as well.

One of the central themes in my "I can't find a mate" class (predominately female, which should tell you something...), is "Well, I just can't forgive him for what he's done to me, yada, yada, yada". I have a huge problem with the way they seem to tackle this issue.

Although the Bible never uses the phrase "forgive and forget", it's filled with scriptures commanding us to forgive one another. If we don't forgive others, we not only reap bitterness, but we lose out on our eternal rewards (I don't know about you, but I want as many rewards as possible once I get to Heaven). Simply put, forgiveness is a decision of the will. Besides that, God wouldn't give us a commandment to forgive if He didn't equip us with the ability to do just that!

Now, the idea of 'forgetting' is a little more complicated, but not really. We're not responsible for literally forgetting stuff, since none of us can selectively 'delete' stuff from our memory. Instead, we "forget" wrong-doing against us by treating it, and the person who did it, as if it never happened. In Hebrews 8:12, God promises not to remember our sins if we ask for forgiveness. But since God is ALL-KNOWING, how does he forget our sins? The truth is, He doesn't. He just doesn't hold them against us if. If we go to Him in humility, seeking His forgiveness, and holding firm in the belief that He will forgive us, then...well, He forgives us! There's no need to sacrifice animals, cut ourselves up to pieces, or starve ourselves to look like Lara Flynn Boyle. The only caveat to receiving God's forgivenss is (1) to confess your sins, (2) ask Him for forgiveness and (3) believe on Him. Sweet, huh?!

At this point, although our sins have been forgiven, the job isn't quite over yet. Just as God forgives us, we, likewise, are to forgive those who have sinned against us. In that respect, we are to "forget" their sins as if they never happened. Ephesians 4:32 reminds us to be kind to one another and to forgive one another...just as Christ forgave us. The parable of the unforgiving servant always seems to come to mind (I'll be writing on this one pretty soon). How can we expect God to forgive us for ALL THE JUNK that we've done against Him if we can't forgive those who do wrong against us?!

My advice to my "I can't find a mate" classmates is: maybe instead of concentrating on finding a mate, we all should learn to forgive...

- ACL

Time

God has an uncanny way of using others to teach me important lessons of life. I just ran into a guy with whom I went to school. I've known this guy for years, from elementary school on up. He was always the popular kid. Well known, athletic, smart. These attributes followed him through most of his academic career, or so I believed. I lost contact with him after high school, but I heard he went on to play football at some junior college out east.

When I saw him recently, he was confined to a wheelchair. Naturally, seeing him in that condition aroused my curiosity but, out of respect for his situation, I declined to ask any questions. However, much to my suprise, he volunteered all sorts of information about why he was handicapped. Apparently, he and some friends were driving intoxicated. They were in a serious accident where he broke seven different vertebrae. He's paralyzed for life.

I remember asking him how he was able to successfully deal with such a dramatic change in his life. With a huge smile on his face, he said one word: "Time". He reminded me that it was his own fault that he was in this position and that it would not have happened unless God allow it (I immediately thought of my Sunday school teacher who shares the same quote with me). He admitted that while he grew to accept what happened to him, it took years of spiritual growth to get to that point. In fact, oddly enough, he credits his paralysis to being the very thing he needed to turn to God. I guess you can say that not being able to walk physically helped him to walk spiritually. Interesting, huh?!

I guess the moral of this story is that Christian growth may require for me to lose -- or give up -- stuff before I can gain. Before I can allow God to bless me with a mate, a new job, a new life, etc., I might have to let go of things that I've become used to. Just as this guy suggested, it won't be easy. It will take a lot of patience, a lot of faith and -- especially -- a lot of time...

- ACL

What's mine is MINE!

"We all have a personal relationship with God that no one else can dictate."

I had this idea fall on my heart after talking to a friend who was just accepted into law school. While I was elated for her, a part of me demonstrated anger and jealousy because of her success. Seeing my friends go out in the world and do great things often times leaves me thinking that I'm a failure.

But, as God's peace fell on me, I realized (1) that I was dope in my own way and (2) the significance of the 'personal relationship' that we each have with God. Simply put, what works best for my friend may not work for me. What God has for me, it is for me. It just becomes a matter of me developing the faith necessary to receive His blessings.

Each of us has to decided how much faith we will present to God, especially when it comes to Him revealing His plans for us. When I say that I "believe in Him", that means more than just saying that I believe that He exists. It means that I love Him even when I don't feel Him; that I trust Him even if I'm in a storm, that I'll follow Him even if His will isn't always clear. II Corinthians 4:17-18 teaches us that personal struggles/hardships are only temporary and that they work for a greater purpose than what I see right now.

In essense, just because your blessing is not in arm's reach, doesn't mean it's not there.

- ACL

Dangerous "Church Folk"

I had an interesting conversation with a lady who attends my church. We'll call her "Johnita Moore". Johnita is one of those "traditional" Christians. You know, the ones who are always pontificating to the younger church goers; using the "decent and in order" scripture to push their church norms, and blindly follow the concept of traditionalism in the church. Yeah. That type.

At any rate, talking to her made me realize that I'm not a typical Christian. For a long time, I believed that 'church folk' could do no wrong. Now I'm starting to see that it's often the church folk who get it twisted the most. We tend to lose sight of "the least of these". Isn't the church supposed to tend to those in need; as opposed to being critical and judgemental of them? Much like this picture, the church often creates a gate of superficiality where some types of people are excluded. Before you argue with me, what happened the last time a drunk person wandered into your church?

Maybe one of my biggest gripes is that most of the sins/actions that church folk have the hardest time getting past are usually those that they have committed themselves. So, my advice to the Johnita Moores of the world is to search your own heart to see if you need to clean yourself up before downing other people for their shortcomings. I've seen people torn down by the church in the name of religion, when it could have very easily used the word of God as a tool of ministry instead.

I've noticed something I call "church culture". I doubt that it's a new concept that I made up, but I see it all the time. It's the scary notion that people have to assimilate to be just like each other in the church. If a person doesn't match that mold, they have a hard time fitting in. I think that's why it's important to realize that God calls for us to conform to Him, not to the church (Romans 12:2). There's a huge difference, no matter what people might say. We have to learn to accept people where they are. We may not agree with all they do, but we have to respect them nonetheless.

Having this spirit is not an impossible chore. After all, Christ deemed us free will moral agents and we should act accordingly. He NEVER forces His will on anyone. Yes, there are consequences for not obeying His will but -- bottom line -- Jesus gives us a say in how we live.

- ACL

Marriage (from a Christian perspective)

After months of anticipation and preparation, two friends finally married. For the record, they're not the people on this magazine cover. I just thought this image would be a cool addition to this post.

At any rate, whenever I watch people marry (especially if I'm involved in the ceremony) certain questions always seem to raise in my head. For instance, I often ask myself "When is right for me to marry?".

As I see ads in the phone book for divorce, it's clear to me that society doesn't view marriage as God does (see I Corinthians 3:18). People don't always realize that a successful marriage first starts with personal communion with God. This intimate relationship with Him allows us to answer questions about things that go into marriage (not just "love").

Successful marriages in Christ are the product of numerous things. If I have your attention, I'd like to share them. This should be fun:

(1) Being equally yoked: The Bible teaches us not to be bound together with unbelievers. Harmony in Christ can't exist when half of the relationship doesn't even follow Him. Take Tauheedah, my last official girlfriend: I mean, this girl was DOPE! Pretty, intelligent, socially conscious. Just an all-around girl. Except...she was Muslim. Not to hate on Muslims (we're all free to worship as we please); but there was no way that I, as a Christian, could expect to connect with someone who viewed Jesus as "just a prophet". You either follow Jesus or you don't. Having one of both types in a marriage is destined for failure, no matter how open-minded they are.

(2) Familiarity: Christian couples, I believe, must be able to recognize the levels of familiarity that they have with one another. Where are they spiritually? What are their views on child-rearing? On the roles of men and women in a marriage? On finances? On their dedication to Christ? As we find mates, familiarity and commitment to one another must be proven, not just offered as lip service.

(3) Recognizing marriage as a covenant: Not only is marriage a commitment to one another, but it's also a covenant (or agreement) with God. It's a promise to remain faithful to your mate until the end of your life--or theirs; whether you're rich or poor, healthy or sick, attractive or...well...not-so-attractive, exciting or boring. Christian marriages should be able to endure the worst of circumstances from anger to depression to sexual dissatisfaction. The Bible teaches us that all things are possible through Christ. This certainly holds true for marriage.

(4) Avoiding emotional reaction: We all want to have the desires of our heart. In fact, God wants that for us. But I've learned that our desires must match His plan and His will. Furthermore, I don't want to commit to someone just because it "feels right". Sure, she gives me butterflies when she calls. Sure, I love doing romantic things with her. But, these feelings won't last forever. Instead, these feelings should give way to a much deeper love, a much stronger commitment, a more solid foundation, an unbreakable security, and a closer walk with God. With patience, faith, and hard work, God will do great things with me...

...and my mate!

- ACL

Indian summer

Well, summer's officially gone. This season has definitely been one of enlightment for me. After spending months questioning myself and my views on other people (particularly those with whom I've had emotion investment), I've come to accept that there comes a point where faith in them just won't come naturally.

I'm starting to recognize the different levels of friendships that I have as well as when their seasons have ended; although it's hard to do at times. I always seem to want more or less from each of my relationships; only to wind up disappointed if they don't turn out the way I want. I suppose that I need to set my expectation of people at least one notch higher than their track record. That way, I won't be suprised or hurt if their "old self" resurfaces. This must be the type of thinking that develops when a person gets hurt over and over.

Don't get me wrong: I don't think that people hurt me intentionally; but they have done so nonetheless. While I think it's healthy - and Christ like- to forgive, I won't put myself in a position to be hurt by the same people time and time again. I see no purpose in that.

- ACL

Slow it down!

A friend of mine sent me this picture as a reminder to slow down while I'm driving (if this doesn't do, those @#$! speeding tickets will). But this picture, in an odd sort of way, makes me realize so much more.

Life can get crazy at times. It's important to remember to slow down if you feel like life is going too fast. Much like that depiction of Jesus barely holding onto the cross, so it is with my faith at times. It can be to the point where we feel like calling it quits and just letting to. But what I've come to realize is that if I continue strong in my faith in God, family, friends, and anything else I hold dear to my heart, I'll never let it go. I`ve learned the hard way that, at the end of the day, all we really have are our integrity, our character & our faith. It`s what we do with those things that matter most.

-ACL