The Golden Rule, version 2.0

"So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets."

- Matthew 7:12 NIV

This passage has been labeled the Golden Rule. This rule has become a universally accepted principle for just about every religion on the planet. It provides us a basis upon which we should treat others. Considering the following:

Example 1: *Note* The names have been changed to protect the innocent (and, I suppose, the not-so-innocent):

A few days ago, I got into a little skirmish with a friend. My issue with him was that he neglected my needs to protect the interest of another person who may have somehow been affected by me. Although this other person probably didn't deserve this special consideration given to him by my friend (especially at my expense), he received it anyway. When I asked my friend about it, he essentially said, "Well, I wouldn't want (whatever the situation was) to happen to me, so I wasn't going to do it to him (the other person)."

Sounds good, right? Sounds like a perfect way to use the Golden Rule, right?

Example 2: Last Sunday, I went out to lunch after morning church services. I sat down in the restaurant, ate a good meal, did some reading and left. One the way back to church, I passed right by a homeless guy. I would've helped this guy out. Really. But, I was running late for church (Ain't it funny how the religious folks did the same thing to beaten man in the Good Samaritan parable? Further evidence that I also suck at being a Christian...)

The next day, as I walking through downtown during my lunch hour, I encountered another homeless man. To make up for the guilt that I had from the day before. I gave the man the rest of my sandwich. I walked a little taller that day, thinking that I had really done some good. I could stick my chest out knowing that I successfully applied the Golden Rule to my life.

Example 3: Most people who know me would say that I'm a kind-hearted person who would go to great lengths to do for other people, even if it means putting myself in a compromising position. In fact, my siblings have affectionately nicknamed me "The Captain", because I'm always "saving" other people. The list of things I've done for others could take up quite a few blogs.

I could end this post right now by telling you that these examples are perfect illustrations for how the Golden Rule works.

But, I think you all know me by now...

The truth is, these are ACTUALLY examples of how we often mistaken our good intentions with our overpowering egos. In each of the aforementioned instances, the people who committed the 'good deeds' (my friend in Example 1, me in Examples 2 and 3) didn't do so for the sake of another person, but rather to satisfy ourselves. Lately, I've noticed that I've been griping (to both my cybernetic and everyday friends) that I'm "giving, giving, giving", but not "receiving". This has been troubling my heart lately, largely because I'm starting to realize how self-centered I am. I guess I need to come clean and say that most of what I do for others is more about me being able to wear it as a shiny badge than for the other person's edification.

For the record, I've never had any beef with the Golden Rule. I mean, it's Biblical for Heaven's sake. My issue, instead, has to do with our application of it. Rather than truly doing for others, we do for others in response to what we do or don't want to happen to us. We pay our tithes and offerings so that God will bless us with tangible items in return (or to have our names visible in the church bullentin. But that's another story...) or that He'll punish us if we don't. We give to charity because we would want people to do the same for us if we were in need. We show kindness to one another because we want to be treated kindly ourselves.

But what happens to our benevolence if it's not reciprocated?

For instance, I'd like to think that I would never kill anybody. Not only is killing flat out wrong, but it causes suffering for more than just the victim. But, what if I said that the one reason why I wouldn't kill someone is because I wouldn't want someone else to kill me or someone close to me? At that point, I place more emphasis on what I don't want for myself than what I do want for the other person.

Don't get me wrong: the Bible clearly states that we should do for others in the way we want that we want them to do for us. But, it doesn't tell us to use our expectation for reciprocity as a motivator for doing what's right. If we really demonstrated God's love in our walk of life, we wouldn't need to follow a rule for us to figure out how we should treat one another and how we respond to God. Do we really need a rule to tell us that we should love, respect and do good for others? Do we really need a rule to tell us that we should love and honor God for...well, just being God?

How much of what we do for others is more about them and less about ourselves?

- ACL